From Baozi to Brötchen...

It's been quiet here lately, I know. For a while now I haven't really been happy with my life in Beijing- my job was starting to get on my nerves, and I was starting to get on the bad side of the culture shock (you know, in the beginning it's all amazement, then enthusiasm, then you start to hate everything). So I began to look for a new job and tried to be as tolerant and open-minded as possible in the meantime. The presence of Himself (who'd moved over end of last year) and our gorgeous apartment were a big help. I kept postponing the next post to when I'd found a new job, or when I'd had the next wave of awe, or simply to whenever I'd feel like writing. Towards the end of May the teaching job became unbearable as I'd realised it simply wasn't what I wanted to do for the rest of my life (and, at age 27, I felt and feel that now is the time to settle for a definite career path). So I quit my job, with my last day being the 25th of June, and went on a mission to find that new challenge, preferably before my notice and working visa would run out. "Quite the risk, that", I hear you say, and it's something that I was fully aware of. By the end of the second week of June I'd done a couple of interviews and felt pretty confident that I'd be all set come the end of the month.

I was reasonably pleased with myself: Not only had I set up a bit of a life in Beijing, had made a nest with my man, but I'd also taken my life into my own hands and sourced another opportunity in this not-so-easy job market (if you're a "foreigner", anyway).

That was all well and good, until the day that changed everything. On the morning of Wednesday, the 18th, I decided that before going to work I'd have a quick look at my emails, something I rarely do. By the end of the day I was on a plane back to Germany, having said goodbye to my colleagues, friends and life in Beijing over the phone, email and Facebook only.

Without going into too much detail, someone in my close family had been admitted to a psychiatric clinic in a serious condition. While of course I was terribly upset and guilty at not having been around to see the signs, I expected to have to stay for a few weeks, maybe a month or two until the patient is better and it's safe to leave if I'd only be in touch regularly. In the ten or so days I've been here, however, it has slowly emerged that things will under no circumstance be as quick as that and that we'll find ourselves visiting the hospital for another while before the person can even be taken home to start therapy there.

With this, my Chinese adventure has come to a very abrupt and painful end, and there's not much I can do about it. I'm looking for jobs in the vicinity of my hometown, and Himself (who has just started a new job himself, back in Beijing) will move back over here with me by the end of the year at the latest.

While I'm looking forward to settling back in and finding a job and being there for my family, I also very much regret leaving Beijing and all the great people I've met there behind. For as much as the place might have been getting on my nerves lately, I'm anything but finished with Beijing, or China. There's so many places yet to see, and so much to try out, but that will all have to wait until sometime in the future.
For if I've learned one thing from the people of China, it's that family comes first.

Unfortunately this will also mean the conclusion of this blog. I've still got some stuff on my camera, some stories to tell, and there's a few lists to be made as well, so there'll be a bit more at least.

For now, thank you very much for following the blog for as long as you have and see you soon for the conclusion!

Bis dann,

Nadine

Oh, and PS: Weed, Marihuana, Pot, or whatever is NOT cool. It's not harmless, and it's not something you can control. It can cause severe psychosis, including hallucinations and paranoia. Yes, you've heard all of that before. Before you light up next time though, think of your family. Imagine them sitting next to you on a hospital park bench in complete despair trying to explain your birth date to you. Or your name.